Equanimity is likened to the way parents feel when their children become adults. The parents have nurtured, have given so much care, have been loving, and then at some point they have to let go. They don’t do so with a cold feeling of withdrawal. They don’t throw the adult child out of the house saying, “Well, it was nice. We don’t really need each other anymore.”

Equanimity has all of the warmth and love of the previous three states but it also has balance, wisdom, and the understanding that things are as they are and we cannot ultimately control someone else’s happiness or unhappiness.

Sharon Salzberg, Loving-Kindness

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