Still, I confess to feeling an unseemly little pleasure at having eluded nature’s snare, saying “fuck you” to all that, though nature’s going to get us all in the end, obviously. It’s also my little “fuck you” to a society that sentimentalizes children except when it comes to allocating enough resources to raise them, and that would include elevating the 22% of children currently living in poverty to a decent standard of living.
Equanimity is likened to the way parents feel when their children become adults. The parents have nurtured, have given so much care, have been loving, and then at some point they have to let go. They don’t do so with a cold feeling of withdrawal. They don’t throw the adult child out of the house saying, “Well, it was nice. We don’t really need each other anymore.”
Equanimity has all of the warmth and love of the previous three states but it also has balance, wisdom, and the understanding that things are as they are and we cannot ultimately control someone else’s happiness or unhappiness.